The English Language

English-I am SO glad this was my first language!

Can you read these right the first time?

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France . Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?


I recieved this email about the English language. It made me laugh because it brought me back to the days I was in Russia. Because I taught the older kids who were pretty fluent in English, I ran into many "problems" trying to teach them the difference between the same word. Also, there was never a good reason as to why you pronounce things differently, when they are spelled the same. The answer was always "just because" or "that's just how it is."

Hope you enjoyed!

No more pencils, No more books, No more teacher's dirty looks...

Okay, so I never got any dirty looks from the one teacher I actually saw. (My other two classes were online)

But...as of last Saturday I am done with school for the semester! It is such a wonderful feeling! This semester was not one of my favorites. No offense to anybody who may appreciate or like these, but business law and statistics are TERRIBLE classes to suffer through! But, fortunately I got them taken and out of the way!

Oh yes, and thanks to good old SLCC....I will not be taking the two classes I have left to take there before transferring this semester. Why? Because they only offer them right in the middle of the day for a few hours, a few times a week. As a working person, I cannot do that! So....I am going to have an AMAZING SUMMER!!! (minus the weeks Ian will be gone to CO)

I keep wondering what I am going to do with myself! I know what things need to get done, but cleaning stuff is BORING! Any FUN ideas?!?!?! Please let me know!